Pancetta and Green Beans

Pancetta is the same damn thing as bacon -- just not smoked, and you can't buy it from the regular supermarket most of the time. Basically, it's bacon for douchebags. Actually I think it's Italian cured pork, and I don't know any Italian douchebags, but I guess I still have a lot to learn.

It's still fatty meat that rocks with many, many things. Bacon rules, and so does pancetta. You can get this fancy-ass pancetta shit at nicer grocery stores but some places just don't have it. If you want, you can just replace the pancetta in the recipe with bacon. And don't feel like this recipe is any worse without the pancetta -- I'm serious when I say it's the same thing.

Shitload of green beans (hell, it depends on how much you want to make)

1/4 - 1/3 lb Pancetta (again this depends on how much you're making. the rule is: more people, more food.)

1 or 2 shallots

Basil (just a few leaves)

Fresh lemon juice

Salt and Pepper

Boil some salted water and toss the green beans when its boiling. Let them dance around in the pot for like 4 or 5 minutes, till the fuckers are cooked but still a bit crisp. Have a bowl of ice water handy to stop them from cooking any further, and toss them in there till they are cool, which will be like five or six minutes. Drain and pat them dry with paper towels or something. They need to be dry because they'll be going into oil later, and you don't want to get splattered later with any water hanging around those damn sneaky beans.

Heat up a saucepan to medium-high or so and throw the diced pancetta in. Cook the little bits till they are brown and crispy. Take them out and let them drain on a paper towel covered plate and eat one of those little guys when it cools off. Damn, isn't it good?

Pour out some of the grease. You're honestly not going to need too much, but its up to you. If you're suicidal or if you think its funny to give your guests the runs, then ADD oil, you dirty bitch. If you're nice then just drain some of it out. Throw in the minced shallots and cook them on medium heat for like five minutes or so, just till they are kind of clear. Turn off the heat, throw the beans in, and toss them in the drippings and shallots till they are covered. Add salt, pepper, lemon juice, and toss the chopped basil in. The basil is actually optional but I've found that green beans and basil can be good friends. The sharp taste of basil matches up with the earthy taste of the beans really well.

Voila. Easy, delicious, and you look damn smart cooking shit like this.